die once.

Last summer, out of the blue,  my dad asked me to go coffin shopping with him. This seemed a little strange so I asked him why. He said that he wanted to make sure that he looked good in his coffin. I asked him if he was planning to try them out and if so, did he want me to take pictures. We never went to the funeral home but we did go to lunch.

A few weeks ago he experienced a health scare. He had a 2nd urinary tract infection in a 3 month period. He saw his Urologist and underwent various tests. He was convinced that he had bladder cancer and that it was quickly spreading. He was upset. He is a type A person who was losing control and he really believed that his was living his last days.

Before the test results came back, I called him up and asked how he was. He told me that he was fine but that he knew he had cancer and that he was going to die. I told him that he was right, he was going to die. It might be today, tomorrow or it might be 30 years from now. He may very well have cancer or he might get hit by a bus. I didn't know why, when or how, but I assured him that he was right, he was going to die. My dad didn't say anything. After a momentary pause I told him that my advice is to not focus on a possible hypothetical outcome but rather to live life now and just die once.

The tests came back a few days later and it was found to be a simple urinary infection; the most likely cause was that the original infection was not completely resolved. He apparently does not have cancer but he does have a happy and grateful family that enjoys his company, quirks and all. We love you dad. Live your life and die once!